Nearing the End in Ahoskie

Sunday was a meaningful day for me in worship in Ahoskie. Kathy and I have two more Sundays with First Baptist, I believe, so I'm reflecting more and more on the meaning of our three years in this community and on the culmination of our work and learning here.

The service started with "God of Our Fathers" utilizing the recently expanded capabilities of our pipe organ. As I was pushing buttons and making enormous sounds, it occurred to me that I was operating one of the most powerful machines that an individual can operate in our vicinity - at least a very big musical machine. Normally, power like that doesn't mean much to me, but the freshness of the sound on this occasion invited me to think of God's power in a way that moved and instructed me.

When I first started playing for worship in Ahoskie, I was feeling the importance of imaging contemplation and gentleness through the way I played in most of our services. I was also trying to make sure the voices of the congregation were supported but not overwhelmed and that the people never felt oppressed by the sounds of the organ. These ideas are still at the core of my approach and personality, but on Sunday, I also felt comfortable with the way power was expressed through the musical rendering.

Why? The text of "God of Our Fathers" eventually focuses on Heaven and the resolution of our earthly conflicts. It lends itself to what I like to picture: the slain lamb returning in such glory that all our attempts at having power are simply irrelevant. I wonder if God's laughing at us, as is sometimes described in the Psalms, is not so much that we are in derision but that we're just funny in our self-importance.

It seems to me that it is not enough to stress God's power, because power alone is not what we believe to be God's essence. God's power is coupled with a willingness to become infinitesimal and totally vulnerable, and to sacrifice self. I can see more of the unique quality of the God of Christianity in this combination of unimaginable power and willingness to become tiny. The Trinity helps me hold all these aspects together in a single deity.

In addition, God's power must transcend all earthly power to an astronomical proportion. An earthly expression of power must be like a cut-out paper doll compared to the reality of the universal God. At the same time, I wonder if the true lowliness of Jesus also dramatically transcends all our human efforts at humility and service.

During Sunday's service, I played "Jesu, Jesu" as offertory, and I played it as expression of tenderness and intimacy. I sensed that I needed to do so to connect back to the grandeur of "God of Our Fathers" so that, all added up, we provided a fuller, truer picture of God's way with us.

The approach to playing for worship services that I have been developing in Ahoskie became crystal clear to me at that time: there need to be a variety of expressions in worship that are combined meaningfully to best convey a sense of the unique character of God. Transcendence is a profoundly stirring part of that unique character to my way of thinking. After considering God's utter transcendence in both powerfulness and powerlessness, I felt as though I had worshiped more thoroughly in spirit and truth than I usually do.

Easter

We're enjoying a beautiful spring here in Murfreesboro.

Last week was Easter and also a special day for me as it was my first Sunday as the official organist/music associate at the First Baptist Church of Ahoskie. For offertory and postlude I played Handel: I Know That My Redeemer Liveth and Palestrina: The Strife is O'er.

I'm still reflecting a bit on the nice spring break we had. On our trip to Raleigh, we visited the state capitol building. As a native North Carolinian, I was very inspired by our time there. Three things I found especially stirring were plaques commemorating the Edenton Tea Party (I graduated from high school in Edenton and some of my ancestors lived there,) and the Halifax Resolves, and the monument to the North Carolinians who were presidents of the U.S.

Kathy's family was here this weekend, and we visited a local store that is typical of many of the things we love about Murfreesboro - The Woolery. The Woolery is owned and run by a couple who moved from Syracuse, NY in search of better weather. In their store we saw all sorts of spinning wheels and looms. They also sell every imaginable sort of book relevant to topics from knitting patterns for your dog's neck warmer to a work called Making the Most of Your Llama to several reference books on the various Tartan plaids. There is also a section of used books on a variety of topics as well as a whole shelf of literature in French!

Pianist/Organist

Today,I substituted as organist at First Baptist in Ahoskie. It was my idea. I thought it would be a good growing experience and fun - and it was.

I played organ for chapel and church services for a couple of years, but rarely in a situation in which a very high standard of organ playing was really required.

This time was different. Since I'm a pianist and not really an organist, and I'm accustomed to maintaining a certain professional and artistic standard in my music making, I'm acutely aware of the unknowns I face when I come to the organ:

1. First, there are the pedals, which I've never practiced for more than a day or two at a time.

2. Registration - It's exciting that the possibilities for sound variation are virtually limitless on the organ, but choosing appropriate combinations is second nature only for good organists.

3. Dynamcs - It's really not obvious how much sound is enough or too much, and the acoustics and organ console placement often obscure the actual volume level at which you're playing!

To put it in another way, having a good pianist who doesn't practice the organ play for a service on a fine pipe organ is like having a watercolor artist execute his vision as a granite sculpture which, by the way, he has to chisel with his feet.

After several days of practice and many mixed emotions, I came to grips with my lack of technic and the unknown instrument and parameters. How? Practice.

I think one of the most wholesome things a musican can do is to practice. What could be better for us than to work on our musical skills, especially when we are preparing for an actual musical event that makes our practicing into clearly needful work?

A little advice for others not in my shoes (that is, other pianists trying to be organists for a day or two.) This advice will be obvious, but try to find a way to play the Doxology without pedals, if at all possible. Don't let your pride get the best of you. After all, viewed in a broader context - and I think it also must be really wholesome to try to view our musical work in a broader context - this whole project is an invitation to humility.

This week, I also spent some nice time with organists. One is my colleague James M. Guthrie whose knowledge as a performer of Baroque and pre-Baroque music is as good as anyone working in the field. He's a practicer!

Kathy and I also spent some time with a wonderful couple of organists, Carol and Paul Doyan in Scotland Neck. Mr. Doyan has a terrific plan for performing all of the works of Vierne during that composer's anniversary a few years away.