"Your Important Self Esteem"

My father would have turned 86 yesterday. 

In his memory, I share the following bit of "self help" he wrote in the 1980s. 

I think we still need it.

Your Important Self Esteem
by Rev. Charles J. Hulin III

A very unfortunate trait of our day is that of persons being forced into situations in which they are made to contest, compete, and clash with others.  Always, someone loses and has the ego bruised. We need cooperation more than competition to build up and bind together the human race. Since we make others feel like "losers" or "lesser persons" or "less than persons" by this onslaught on their esteem, such persons are nullified, in a sense, so they have to try to assert the self again. This is often done through various "attention getters."


Some "attention getters" used to massage the ego in hopes of regaining a sense of personhood:

being rebellious                 "I reject you."

being bossy                        "I am leader."

being dishonest                  "I am sly."

being sensational               "I am unusual."

being boastful                    "I have accomplished."

being self-centered            "I am important."

being "martyred"               "I suffer."

being self-righteous           "I am good."

being perfectionistic          "I am flawless."

being boisterous                "I am here!"

being sullen                       "I am not impressed."



Your Self Esteem

Always keep in mind that your self esteem is not dependent on others! Never think less of your self based on the thoughts of others.

1. Acceptance of you as a person

You were neither created nor endowed by any man. You were created and endowed by your Maker; you came from Him and will return to Him! You are a person and most unique since no one has ever been just like you, and no one can change that!

2. Approval of your intentions

You need no one's approval for your hopes and dreams. Your hopes and dreams are just that - YOURS! We all are taught when babies to win approval, and to avoid disapproval, from our parents. Thus, we live for years doing just that! Now, however, you are a grown-up person - your own person - and the approval of others is not necessary; Others may not know enough to qualify for approving or disapproving in regards to your life.

3. Appreciation of your accomplishments

Your importance as a person does not depend on whether your efforts are appreciated. You do what you do because it is your desire and capability as a person to do so. Tell yourself that because it is true! Tell yourself that many times a day if necessary.


Results:

If you believe and practice these three above, you will find that, being independent of others regarding your worth and esteem, you will:

view others objectively

view no one as threatening

discover the great potential in your life to be a very real, strong, noble, loving person.